II just don’t think I can do this anymore. Since I’ve been back with the family I’ve been purging a lot more, and I just hate it. I hate how messy it is, how it really doesn’t get me to my weight loss goals (still fat as fuck) All it does is allow me to fool them into thinking that recovery has stuck but really no it hasn’t. Instead of fasting I’ve just gone to purging a shit ton more. I’m just done, I’m done trying to keep them happy. Let them worry about my not eating, its better than shoving my fingers down my throat every fucking day. I’m going to go back to old habits. It was better than. I need it again.